Don't gain weight while non-dieting!

A little weight gain while learning non-dieting is okay? So say the experts. But I don't think so.

I don't know about you, but whenever I seek alternative healing of any kind, even the more mainstream chiropractic, I never report, "It's getting worse!" I find that these healers love that statement too much. They'll always reply, "That means it's about to get better."

Likewise, non-dieting gurus love to tell you that your new-found weight gain is a signal that you're about to start losing, big time.

I don't buy it. I say, if you're learning normal eating (also called non-dieting) and you're gaining weight, you're doing something wrong. Initial weight gain is not inevitable (unless of course you started out underweight). Instead, your weight should level off or drop.

Here's how to avoid weight gain when you've finally ditched the diet:

1. Take legalizing with a grain of salt. That is, when you legalize all foods, as suggested by some of the non-dieting gurus, this simply means that you'll now remember that fats don't make you fat, and neither do carbs or sugar.

2. Get your mind firmly fixed on the idea that overeating makes you fat. I notice that folks on the board who really understand portion size are often those who've read Gwen Shamblin's book, The Weigh Down Diet.

I urge you to read Shamblin's book (ignore the Christian content if you desire), or mine (a secular alternative to Gwen's), especially if you've read some non-dieting books that overemphasize legalizing while under emphasizing portion control. Gwen Shamblin suggests starting your new normal eating career by cutting your usual portions in half.

Gwen Shamblin aptly states that dieting is about making the food behave (that is, changing the content of the food so it won't make you fat) and that it's now time to make yourself behave instead.

3. Accept the idea that it is dieting itself that increases our appetite, due to chronic deprivation of taste, timing, and certain food ingredients. We try to make up for quality with quantity. Now here we are trying to learn to eat normally again, but our portions are much bigger than they once were, due to all the dieting.

That's why in my book I even go so far (horrors!) as to suggest reading The Zone Diet, just to get an idea of what real portion sizes look like (ignore all the math and precision and do add sugar to your diet).

4. Get used to the word "small." Portions should be small small small. It's okay to eat small portions. If you're listening to your body's hunger and fullness cues, small will be all you need. We think we need a lot of food to be satisfied but it's not so. Instead, we need the right foods to be satisfied.

5. Our bodies don't like refined white flour and tons of carbs. It is my personal belief, based on my experience in counseling others and my own experience, that weight is best controlled when we try to stick to complex carbohydrates (such as potatoes) and whole grains (such as multigrain bread and pasta.) The occasional thin slice of cake made with white flour would be a treat, but ice cream for dessert is generally a better choice. So think complex carbs and whole grains.

6. Our bodies are more rapidly satisfied while chowing down if our meals are balanced. So to the extent possible, at each meal, get some carbs, protein, sweets, fruits or vegetables. Eat the way your grandmother told you to eat.

7. It's astounding to see the irrational beliefs folks carry right with them into non-dieting, the most insidious one often being the belief that suddenly with non-dieting, you can eat all you want of any food, and lose weight. This is known in psychology as "magical thinking." Sorry. It won't work. The truth is that our bodies don't need much food. The point of non-dieting is to find out how to eat such delicious, balanced, healthy, satisfying meals that our bodies are easily happy with just a few bites and lots of conversation at the table.

8. You may have compromised your metabolism by past dieting, but over time, if you allow yourself enough fats and a balanced diet, your metabolism will improve. In the meantime, though, your true appetite (if you're following hunger and fullness) should allow for less food.

9. Some folks try all these things, but they're emotional eaters. Be sure and address your emotional eating.

The biggest challenge for many new normal eaters is the adjustment to small portions. But don't worry. These portions are not dictated by daily points, zone percentages, prepackaged meals, or calorie counting.

No matter how far gone your instincts are, you can restore your ability to judge portion sizes for yourself, and you can learn to curb your appetite. Read "Does portion control scare you?"