Too many habits to change?

You have all these habits to change, yet in your support groups you're told "Don't be so hard on yourself!"

How can you have both? Can you go easy on yourself, yet change such a basic, entrenched part of yourself? And the answer is...

It's a balancing act. If you're a black and white thinker, you might not like hearing that.

But I have a secret for you that will make it easier. There is one single most powerful and critical habit which, if you are willing to work out, will make all the other changes easier. You really can be easy on yourself while making this change, and forever afterward.

Ready? Here is the work:

Your habit of saying "I must." Yes that's it. Think about "I must."

I must lose weight now
I must learn Intuitive Eating
I must stop weighing in three times a day
I must learn to love myself
I must learn portion control
I must legalize all foods
I must learn to listen to my hunger signals
I must learn to stop when I'm slightly full
I must learn to stop saying I must

Consider its replacement. "I'd strongly prefer."

Now let's return to the starting gate of this essay. We said you have all these habits to change, yet at the same time you're told not to be so hard on yourself.

Doesn't "I strongly prefer" resolve this dichotomy?

You have all these habits that you'd strongly prefer to change. That's not being hard on yourself. It's identifying what you'd really like to do. Doing what we really like to do is manageable. It's not being hard on ourselves. It's being very easy on ourselves.

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Find out more about Linda Moran's book, How to Survive Your Diet.