Seeking validation

Do you seek validation on an ongoing basis?Too sensitive and shaky to be self-accepting? You're not alone.

Diet Survivors members report seeking validation as a reason for their overeating. They're in an endless state of seeking validation, which they get little of, and in the meantime, they eat.

Overeating serves to keep us from facing ourselves, from living with our errors and failures.

This kind of overeating is a distraction, and may not include stuffing to the point of numbness. Rather, it's just something to do.

Does your validation-seeking keep you from doing other productive things? The problem is not that you're not good enough or that you make too many mistakes.

The problem is that you're awfully hard on yourself. If you're a go-getter like me, that means you take social risks. But if you're then seeking affirmation, you might find yourself frustrated much of the time, and want to overeat to district yourself while waiting for the ever-elusive validation.

Validation is fine, and it's good for us to select friends carefully so we get some of that, but is it tolerable not to be affirmed and validated every time you make a move? Have you been believing you can't tolerate lack of validation? It's time to rethink.

Consider this today--decide whether you would like to learn to live with yourself, in the moment, right in the middle of realizing you've possibly made yet another mistake. The fiftieth one this week.

Can living with yourself and without validation become your norm? We all make those fifty mistakes, by the way, but in a day, not a week.

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Find out more about Linda Moran's book, How to Survive Your Diet.