Positive self-talk: February 2008 Archives
I can't help laughing at myself sometimes. It's the best medicine, as they say, and hopefully it will cure what ails me (eventually).
While it's true I've discovered normal eating, that doesn't make me normal. In fact, from day to day I still struggle with self-acceptance. And I don't mean of the "I don't like myself today" variety. It's way more extreme. It rears its ugly head especially when I'm tired.
To measure up, I gotta compare myself with the worst criminals ever living. That's why I read true crime before falling asleep. Right now, I'm reading every book ever written about the Green River Killer, the serial killer disguised as a nice guy that took the lives of over 40 women before he got caught.
I've read so much about him that I've learned some intimate details of his life, and even have grown to like the guy, in a twisted kind of way.
Which brings us back around to normal eating. The Green River Killer, it turns out, was a normal eater. (Well, I suppose he still is now that he's behind bars.)
He used to say such mundane and level-headed things as "I've had enough food for today." And that was that. He'd stop eating for the day, even if his gentle wife would offer him a delectable slice of cheesecake. As a result, he stays slim and trim.
There's really no point to this entry, except to say let's ditch the idea that we have to "achieve" some kind of wellness before we can eat normally. How about do what the Green River Killer did (I don't mean the killing.) I mean, say, "I've had enough food for today."
And know forever that you don't have to be right in the head in order to learn normal eating. What a relief, huh? Not one of us is entirely right in the head anyway.
I hope my readers can take this in the right light. I never mean to make light of a killer. But sometimes we just gotta laugh at ourselves, and I'm sure some of my readers can identify.
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